I currently coexist in two worlds.

One world is where I am constantly seeking something greater in my life, a bigger impactful purpose that I have always felt was calling me. The other world is one of quiet sadness, where every action I take is focused on slowly putting my life together after great loss, piece by piece.

Honestly this is quite an interesting place to be.

Words that are a daily part of my life right now are grief, wellness and success. Each being wildly different, bringing with it accompanying emotions. One moment I find myself overcome with sadness still mourning the losses of my mother, father and son. The next moment I am laser focused on the now and what I can do to support my quest for wellness. And then the moment after that I am strategizing about how I can gain knowledge and fulfill my greater life purpose, whatever that may be.

For a while now it has been confusing and exhausting trying to figure out how I could exist in this chaotic space. To be devastated and determined at the same time is no easy feat. But this is my reality.

But I am slowly learning to navigate through these murky waters. And actually I recently realized that maybe allowing these two worlds to collide would create the one world I can only dream of living in. Just maybe my sadness and healing will unlock my greater purpose.

I don’t know where or when these two worlds can collide, but I am willing to take the chance to see what the possibilities could be.